Monica Lewinsky recalls pain, humiliation after revelation of affair with Bill Clinton

Gilbert Carrasquillo/Splash News/Gilbert Carrasquillo/Splash News

Monica Lewinsky was 'in love' with former President Bill Clinton, the disgraced former intern revealed Monday.

'Sixteen years ago, fresh out of college ... I fell in love with my boss,' the infamous former White House staffer told a business conference Monday during an eye-opening speech about her devastating experience in the public eye following the revelation of her affair with Clinton - her first public address in 13 years.

'Overnight I went from being a completely private figure, to a publicly humiliated one. I was patient zero,' she said, according to reporters present at the Forbes magazine '30 Under 30' summit, where Lewinsky spoke. 'The first person to have their reputation completely destroyed by the Internet.'

Mike Marsland/WireImage

Lewinsky, now 41, has slowly resumed a media presence this year after more than a decade of silence following the infamous affair she had with then-President Bill Clinton.

'There was no Facebook, Twitter or Instagram back then,' she said. 'But there were gossip, news and entertainment websites replete with comment sections and emails which could be forwarded. Of course, it was all done on the excruciatingly slow dial up. Yet around the world this story went. A viral phenomenon that, you could argue, was the first moment of truly 'social media'.'

@MonicaLewinsky/via Twitter

'Staring at the computer screen, I spent the day shouting: 'oh my god!' and 'I can't believe they put that in' or 'That's so out of context,'' she said. 'And those were the only thoughts that interrupted a relentless mantra in my head: 'I want to die.''

Lewinsky said she wants to use her experience to combat online harassment and bullying.

'Having survived myself, what I want to do now is help other victims of the shame game survive, too,' she said. 'I want to put my suffering to good use and give purpose to my past.'

Earlier Monday, Lewinsky joined Twitter, quickly amassing, in just hours, nearly 20,000 followers.